so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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