i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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