I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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