Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
