"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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