so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Randomize
