she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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