your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
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I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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