Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize