So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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