the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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