I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize
