Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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