I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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