There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
