we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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