wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
vagina is talking i cant
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
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