So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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