Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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