It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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