I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
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