New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize