the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
