Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
