Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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