I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Randomize
