Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I can't turn off my feet"
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
