You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
