Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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