She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I think a kid would responsible me up
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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