Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Too much gin, very little bucket
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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