love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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