Already got asked if we're dating
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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