OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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