Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
