dude i'm inner monologue high
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
