Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
