You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
