i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
