Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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