So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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