i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
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Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
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I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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