I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize