you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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