Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.

  (1-410): View more from Maryland

  I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube. (1-410): I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds. http://tfl.nu/szhm
  Replies (13) Good night (4888) Bad night (944)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass http://tfl.nu/ur9n
  Replies (14) Good night (4929) Bad night (925)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel". http://tfl.nu/2v56
  Replies (15) Good night (5214) Bad night (1085)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  get to allyx's house asap

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Ok is everything ok

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Yeah, theres just lesbians

  (312): View more from Illinois

  omg yes on my way

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (224): get to allyx's house asap (312): Ok is everything ok (224): Yeah, theres just lesbians (312): omg yes on my way http://tfl.nu/mxwb
  Replies (38) Good night (7027) Bad night (1364)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids. http://tfl.nu/o5lf
  Replies (15) Good night (3245) Bad night (1445)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big. http://tfl.nu/u6h6
  Replies (15) Good night (7087) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk. http://tfl.nu/rzly
  Replies (3) Good night (1974) Bad night (1008)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop... http://tfl.nu/qb0c
  Replies (3) Good night (964) Bad night (592)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old. http://tfl.nu/lqlu
  Replies (6) Good night (481) Bad night (837)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  We won Spring Training 2013.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them. (609): We won Spring Training 2013. http://tfl.nu/awkc
  Replies (3) Good night (755) Bad night (284)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off. http://tfl.nu/1s94
  Replies (3) Good night (607) Bad night (304)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita. http://tfl.nu/fdg7
  Replies (3) Good night (710) Bad night (322)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life. http://tfl.nu/k0oq
  Replies (2) Good night (836) Bad night (463)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?

  (1-507): View more from Minnesota

  Fuck you, my tits are fabulous

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch? (1-507): Fuck you, my tits are fabulous http://tfl.nu/jvov
  Replies (4) Good night (1057) Bad night (284)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.

  (941): View more from Florida

  Oh at the liquor store again?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board. (941): Oh at the liquor store again? http://tfl.nu/01vl
  Replies (0) Good night (621) Bad night (290)

Randomize