I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The struggles of a small town man whore
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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