Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
