There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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