i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
that's an acceptable place to lick
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize