Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
