Will you blow on my dice?
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
