there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
