I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Randomize
